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Night of the Living Repairmen - Diary of a Necromancer
Excuse me, I'm making perfect sense, you're just not keeping up
Night of the Living Repairmen
On tonight's episode of "Renovation Nightmare Theatre":

*Creepy Maintainance Guy makes his reappearance on Monday, takes one look at the gush from the toilet pipe, and disappears with a vague threat to return on the morrow with A Real Plumber, insinuating that the Tenant is rebuffing his advances because she is a lesbian. Meanwhile, a sinister development is brewing beneath the bathroom floor...

Tuesday, while waiting around irritably for the promised Real Plumber to arrive circa 1 PM, I was instead startled by the return of the full-press Maintainance Crew at 11ish, who revealed that the morning's renewed jackhammering throughout the building did indeed portend the resumption of the supposedly fixed leak under our bathroom floor. Last week's half-assed repairs to closet wall and bathroom floor were torn out, to be replaced by a quarter-assed fix of the floor and a large hole in the closet wall to theoretically be addressed today. They also attempted to repair the leaking toilet pipe with cement, with the expected lack of results. Landlord is to be notified this morning that --

[interruption from next room, where Snip has just peed in Mum's bed]

-- as I was saying, landlord is to be notified this morning that her repair crew is about as competant as the Three Stooges and if she ever wants this situation to be conclusively fixed she had better bite the bullet and send in a Real Plumber, and soon --

[interruption from next room, where Mum is demanding I get up and scoop the catbox instead of whatever Frivolous Nonsense I have sat down to do just now]

-- Um, where was I? Ah, right, calling the landlord; I desperately need to know what's going on and when it's going to be resolved, since I haven't had a moment's peace or eight uninterrupted hours of sleep in more than a week, and that's not even counting all the noisy banging-around during the week before that. Not to mention that between the unscheduled appearances of Maintainance and the intermittent interruptions of the water service, I've been too terrified to take a shower. I had wanted to sit down and Get Things Done with the start of the new year, but at present it's looking like being February already before I can count on resumption of a 'normal' routine without threat of water problems, workmen sawing through electrical lines and frying Formerly if I do try to work while I'm waiting around for them, or unscheduled solicitations or worse from Creepy Maintainance Guy. (If I disappear mysteriously, would somebody tell the police who to suspect? thanks :) )

I am on the verge of developing a tic in my right eye...

ON EDIT: Oh, yeah, and I meant to mention that while alas, I did not spot my Vast Backsides in Monday's episode of 'Antiques Roadshow", the third and final episode that was taped here last spring will be airing next Monday at 8... I think I was wearing tan shorts and a white Apple-themed t-shirt, but who remembers at this remove.

feeling: hysterical

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